Bits and Pieces
by Scruffy-Nerf-Hearder
Summary: A collection of one shots written in my "Which Me Do You Like?" and "Ever Present Past" universe. One shots aren't to be read in any particular order, enjoy as you see fit!
1. Kayla's New Word

_**Hey ya'll, this is the first of the one shots I've written for my stories, I hope you enjoy it. I've got some other ones coming out as well, some of them will be short, some of them will be long, some will be funny, or dark or romantic, or all over the place. **_

_**Sometimes I write a scene that won't fit in anywhere, but I love it so I've got to keep it. This is ones of those scenes. I keep seeing this word everywhere so I thought I'd use it here. I hope you like this! **_

_**Disclaimer: Contrary to popular belief, I do not own the Avengers.** _

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Bruce was cooking dinner. Minnie wasn't the only Banner who had a secret cooking ability, though years of living on his own had given him plenty of time to learn. Kayla was sitting on the counter in the kitchen wearing one of the princess outfits Dallas had sent over. Just looking at the ridiculous outfit he couldn't help but think about the argument that had ensued when he had found out his wife had gone to New York. It wasn't that he was upset with her, it was just, he was concerned.

Concerned about how nonchalantly she told him about it after the fact, concerned that she didn't see the danger in her running off to New York where their main enemy, a man who would do anything to hurt him or his family a man who made him so angry he-

"_Shit._" he swore as the knife he was using to cut onions slipped and nicked his thumb. Kayla looked up with a gasp and he looked at her, a look of guilt crossing his face.

"Daddy!" she said astonished as he went to the sink and turned on the cold tap, running the cold water over his thumb. "You got a boo-boo." she said and he sighed, she hadn't been affected by his little swear word. She turned around and climbed off of the counter, stumbling slightly as she hit the ground. She ran off to the bathroom and he could hear her rummaging around for a moment, before she came back with a band aid. "Daddy." she tugged on his pants legs as he dried off his cut with a paper towel, before kneeling down. She put the band aid on his thumb and he smiled as he smoothed it down and then kissed the band aid. "All better." she said and he smiled before he kissed the top of her head.

"All better." he said before he picked her up and put her back on the counter. "Thank you Princess." he said and she grinned as he picked up the knife and even though there wasn't any blood on it he washed it before scooping the onions up in his hands and put them in a pan to sauté.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"Amanda's home." she said looking at the front window. He looked at the front window too and saw Amanda walking to the house hand in hand with Piotr, the young man she had become infatuated with from her school.

He watched as the two spoke for a moment, Piotr said something making Amanda smile as he reached out and held up a lock of her hair. She swatted his hand away making Bruce smile before Piotr put his hand on Amanda's shoulder, stroking her neck with his thumb. She looked up at him with a small smile before he leaned down and caught her lips with his. Bruce stood there for a moment staring as the two teenagers kissing before he looked at Kayla who was covering her eyes like the way she did when Bruce and Minnie would kiss in front of her. He rolled his eyes before he walked to the kitchen.

"Five... Four... Three... Two... One." he got to the doorway and was about to open the door when he heard someone walking up to the house.

"Greetings Amanda!" Thor's voice boomed out. "And greetings young man of metal! Is your father home Amanda?"

"Hey Thor, um, yeah, he's here." Amanda said as she opened the door. "Oh, hey. Wow. This is... Um..."

"_Awwwkwaaard._" Kayla called from the kitchen where she was standing on the counter.

"Tony taught her that." Amanda said when she saw the look on Bruce's face.

"What did I teach her?" Tony asked from where he and Pepper were walking up to the house. "Hey Buddy, we missed you." he said as he clapped Bruce on the shoulder and looked at Amanda's red face, Thor had gone into the house and Piotr looked pretty embarrassed himself. "Did I interrupt something? Please say yes, working in the lab has been so boring."

"Did I invite everyone over and forget about it?" Bruce asked as Hawkeye and Natasha walked over.

"Tony!" Pepper hit his arm and he rubbed it looking a little annoyed.

"What? He needs company." Tony shrugged and Pepper sighed before looking at Bruce who suddenly understood what was going on.

"I am so sorry Bruce, Tony said you invited everyone over." she sighed and he waved a hand.

"Don't worry about it Pepper, I was just starting dinner."

"We can go..."

"No, no, don't worry, go ahead." he said and Amanda started to slip into the house with Piotr, Bruce caught his shoulder and Piotr stopped, making Amanda look back guiltily as Piotr turned around and walked away.

"No." Bruce said to Amanda who looked at him with frustration.

"But I-"

"We'll talk later." he said and she sighed before walking into the house, he let everyone else in and Tony looked at Amanda.

"So what is it I'm the scapegoat for Kayla saying this time?" Tony asked and Amanda rolled her eyes.

"You taught her how to say 'Awkward' during awkward situations." she reminded him.

"Why did I get a note saying Assemble?" Steve asked as he walked into the house followed by Logan who looked a little amused at the note.

"Team party at Hulk's house." Tony said as he handed Logan a beer. "Kayla, tell them the word you say in an awkward situation when Uncle Clint is there." he said to the little girl who was watching her dad start to chop more onions.

"Uncle Clint?" she asked and thought for a moment. "Oh yeah- _Hawkwaaard_." she said with a wide grin while everyone started cracking up.


	2. First Dance

_**Hey ya'll, here's a new chapter in Bits and Pieces, I know It's been awhile since I've updated Ever Present Past, but I've hit a small snag in the story, don't worry, I'm working through it, I've just got to work on one more detail before I can get it back to where I want it, plus I've been in Las Vegas for awhile, and, well, I've been busy! =) Anyways, this is a pretty fluffy chapter featuring Minnie and Bruce, and takes place during Chapter 40 of Which Me Do You Like, it's during the hours between Minnie and Bruce moving into the house, and when they get Jarvis first introduced to the house. Anyways, I hope you like it! **_

_**This chapter is titles First Dance**_

_**Disclaimer: I've been trying to win the rights to Marvel in Las Vegas. Sadly I keep loosing.** _

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By the time the movers left it was nearing the late afternoon, besides Erin and Aaron introducing themselves a few other neighbors came over to say hello, there was the man who lived next door on our right, Basil Kirk, a firefighter who had the privilege of working nights, there was the older gentleman and his younger wife who lived next door to Basil, Dr. Leonard Jewel, and his wife Gwen, to me it seemed like Gwen was one of the only real people on this street. Aside from them, we mat a young couple, Calvin and Amanda James, an old couple, Edith and Martin Stein, the preschool teacher, Molly Montgomery, and her boyfriend Jacob Kenner

It was way too much all at once, and everyone wanted to know how we met, even though we hadn't had time to read the stupid file SHIELD had provided for us. When the movers could they would call us, asking for our help on where to put things, or say our phones were ringing or something like that, but other times we had to awkwardly change the subject, which is not one of my favorite things to do. When we finally were left alone by the curious neighbors and the ever helpful movers we were left with the task of finishing unpacking.

Seeing as everything we cared about was left in our apartment that we had no idea what SHIELD was planning on doing with, opening every box was a surprise. Kitchen appliances, towels, everything a married couple would need while avoiding a group of psychotic scientists hell bent on gathering the DNA of my husband and our unborn child.

"Look at these glasses Honey," I said as I unwrapped one of them from the paper it was wrapped in.

"They're nice." he said as he looked at them.

"No, they're not _nice_," I said as I set it down on the table. "They're _beautiful_."

"Okay, they're beautiful." he chuckled. He was unwrapping plates and putting them on the table. I set down the paper and walked over to where he was sitting and stepped behind him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders leaning down to rest my chin on his shoulder. He took one of my hands and gently kissed my hand before turning his head to kiss me.

"Have you seen the bedroom yet?" I asked and he nodded.

"It's hard to believe this is a safe house." he said and I nodded.

"It's hard to believe it's a safe house _no one uses_." I pointed out and he nodded in agreement. "Hey, come help me move the couch." I said as I stood up and moved my arms from around him.

"You shouldn't be moving things," he pointed out. "Why don't you let me do it?"

"Just one side of the couch should be fine." I said and he shook his head.

"What's wrong with where it is?" he asked as we walked to the living room.

"Babe, it's blocking the back door." I said with a laugh.

"Blocking, or giving us a good view of the back yard?" he asked as he walked over to it. "Oh I'm so tired from moving, I wish I had a great view." he plopped down on the couch. "Oh look at that, nice back yard, trees, mountains, suburbia..." he sighed and I laughed as I crossed my arms. "There's an even better view." he said as he looked at me and I raised an eyebrow as he took my hand.

"What's that?" I asked and he took my hand, pulling me close to him.

"My wife." he said as he pulled me onto the couch next to him. I smiled as I wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissed him.

"Honey, can I ask you something?" I asked as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"Mmhmm." he said and I looked at him.

"Is this how you picture it?" I asked and he frowned lightly.

"Pictured what?" he asked and I shrugged.

"I don't know... This, us." I said and he sighed as he looked down at me.

"Honestly? No." he said and my face fell. "I didn't picture myself putting you in danger like I did, I didn't picture having to go in to enemy territory and get you away from a terrorist group everyone thought died out in the forties, and honestly, I didn't picture having to put you into a situation where I'd have to take you away from everything you know and love so that you could survive." he said and I let out a long sigh.

"Honey, you want to know what I didn't picture?"

"Hm?" he asked and I turned his face so he was looking at me.

"I didn't picture that while I was working for Tony Stark that I would meet the person I could honestly say I want to spend the rest of my life with." I said as I stroked his cheek. He smiled lightly and I pecked his cheek gently. "I didn't picture that I'd meet the father of my child, and in the future, children, and while I didn't picture I'd have a wedding where my dad didn't give me away, my mom wasn't sobbing in the front row and Dallas tried in vain to convince me to let him be my maid of honor, I wouldn't change _anything_."

"Nothing?" he asked with a raised eyebrow and I rolled my eyes.

"Okay I'd change the fact that we're in _the suburbs_... And even if we were stuck in the suburbs, I'd make sure we had a damn pool, but aside from that, I wouldn't change anything."

"You wouldn't change the fact that your husband changes into an uncontrollable green rage monster?" he asked and I shook my head.

"Nope. Know why? Because when I said "I Do" I said it to everything about you. I married you, all of you, I married the other guy, I married that silly habit you have where you start messing around with your hands when you're nervous, and your not so secret love of peanut butter," I said and he smiled lightly. "But most of all I married the man I know I want to spend the rest of my life with." I said and he wrapped his arms around me.

"What would I do without you?" he asked softly and I smiled as I ran my fingers through his thick black curls.

"Oh you know, the usual, be an insane bachelor like Tony was for the rest of your life while blowing whatever money you have on frivolous items." I shrugged and he looked up at me with a doubtful look on his face. "Or go back to Calcutta or something, who am I to say?" I joked.

"You know, you're right about one thing." he said as he stood up and walked over to my computer that was playing music.

"Just one thing?" I asked and he laughed lightly.

"It's a tradition for a bride to have a first dance, isn't it?" he asked as he typed on my computer for a moment, and then looked at me where I was leaning on the back of the couch, watching him.

"What, here?" I asked and he nodded. I smiled and got off of the couch, kicking away crumpled up newspaper and a collapsed box from my path before I took his hand. He hit a button on the keyboard before stepping closer to me and wrapping his arm around my waist, holding the other in his. I let out a laugh as the Beach Boys, _**"God Only Knows"**_ came on. I rested my head on his shoulder, letting him lead as we danced.

"Where did you learn to dance?" I asked and he chuckled lightly.

"Uh, believe it or not, my cousin taught me." he said and I looked up at him curiously. "She said how could I ever find a girl if I didn't know how to dance?" he explained and I smiled as I rested my head on his shoulder again.

"Remind me to send her a thank you card." I muttered and he let out another small chuckle. When the song ended I looked up at him and smiled to see him looking down at me before he cupped my face and leaned down to gently kiss me. We were in the middle of a long kiss when the packet the movers had given us started buzzing making us both look over at it.

"The hell?" Bruce muttered as he walked over to it. He picked up the packet and opened it before rolling his eyes and pulling a phone out.

"It's Phil." he said and I scoffed lightly.

"Give me that." I said as I walked over to him. I took the phone and hit the answer button. "Mrs. Banner speaking." I said and smiled as I looked at Bruce who grinned.

"Minnie, I just wanted to check in on you two and make sure you two got to the house okay."

"We're fine sweetie." I said as I looked up at Bruce who was running his fingers through my hair. "I'm pretty sure Fury picked this house because it's in the suburbs and he's getting revenge on me for that time I locked him in the kitchen at Stark Mansion, but aside from that, and the fact that no one in this neighborhood can mind their own damn business, everything is fine." I assured him making him chuckle.

"That's good. Fury wants me to set up a meeting with you to ensure everything is going okay in the next month or so." he explained and I raised an eyebrow even though he couldn't see it.

"Does he make you do this for everyone?" I asked and he laughed.

"There aren't enough hours in the day." he said and I smiled.

"God, I know that." I muttered. "Look, Phil, I'm gonna go, okay?"

"Alright Minnie. I'll be in touch."

"I have no doubt you will. Good night."

"Night." he said before hanging up.

"Fury wants Phil to come check in on us in a month." I said and he nodded as he looked up from the file he was looking at.

"Yeah it also says he has a doctor's appointment planned for us at the hospital a few minutes away."

"Really?" I asked and he nodded as he held out the file. "Oh look, honey, this is our "Back story"." I said using finger quotes.

"What's it say?" he asked as I read it.

"That you were a teacher at a university, and that I worked at a lab you used sometimes for your students and we met and started dating, but decided to move away from the city to raise a family." I said as I looked at the file.

"Well, that's pretty unoriginal."

"And unrealistic." I said with a sigh. "I'm not smart enough to work at a lab- Oh wait, here we go, I was a secretary there. That makes sense."

"You could work at a lab." he said as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"You're sweet, but there's no way I could do most of that sciencey stuff." I shook my head.

"Oh come on, you're not that bad."

"Babe, you're lucky I know what the Higgs boson particle is." I said and he smiled.

"See, not many people know what that is." he said encouragingly.

"I only looked it up because I heard Tony call out an intern for applying to the science division of R&D without knowing what it was." I admitted and he laughed lightly.

"Well at least you looked it up." he said and I smiled.

"Yeah, I'm pretty good at looking up things I don't understand. I still don't understand why Tony called that intern out when most of the science he does in engineering, and not particle physics, but that's Tony for you."

"Who knows what goes on in his brain most of the time?" he muttered and I smiled before there was a knock on the door.

"Who's that?" I asked and he smiled.

"I ordered some pizza a little while ago when you were upstairs." he said and I grinned. "I may not be able to tell some things, but I know when you're hungry and don't want to cook. No to mention we didn't finish unpacking the kitchen." he shrugged before going to pay the pizza guy. When he came back he put the pizza on the table and handed me one of the plates he had unwrapped.

We took the pizza to the couch still facing the sliding glass back door and sat down, me curling up against his side while he wrapped his arm around me. "Still wouldn't change anything?" he asked as we looked out at the back yard.

"Nothing." I said and looked up at him with a smile. HYDRA be damned, I was married, pregnant, and I was going to enjoy my life with my husband, even if it meant dealing with them sometime in the future.

Because for right that moment, eating pizza on a couch overlooking the woods behind out house, and listening to the Beach Boys while Bruce alternated from eating pizza to looking through our packet, I was the happiest woman in the world.


	3. Message from the Direcor of SHIELD

_**Hey ya'll, I had an idea for something new, and I thought I'd give it a try. This is a note from everyone's favorite Mrs. Banner here to explain for you. **_

_**Disclaimer: I only own Minnie. Nothing affiliated with Marvel is mine and I am not making money off of this, just having some fun.** _

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Hello everyone,

Minnie Banner here! Well, I've found myself with a little free time, and I thought, what better way to spend it then to answer some questions you guys might have! Phil says as long as the questions don't break protocol or give away any important S.H.I.E.L.D. secrets, I can answer whatever I want. I should also mention, I'm obviously very close to the Avengers, so I won't be answering any questions that could you know, put them into danger or anything like that. But I will answer some questions about them. Same with my kids, again, obviously. Plus, Amanda would never forgive me. So, send in some questions, and I'll post my answers soon! Let's say in about a week huh? There will be a new story on this account titled "I'm Your's" because- Well, I'm your's to answer questions. I'm not actually your's, I mean, if I had to say I belonged to anyone, well, these days Bruce would say I belong to S.H.I.E.L.D. but I'd say I'm all his. Anyway, getting off subject there, look out for it, I'll have it posted tonight, and who knows, maybe even Amanda or Heather would be interested in doing something like this too. Or Maggie when she and Clint get back- Whoops, Phil says I just gave out too much information on an ongoing case, and Bruce is forbidding Amanda from talking to strangers on the internet. It's so cute how he gets all over-protective and fatherly of her. Also, if you have any questions for my family, I call them every weeks, so I can ask them the questions for you as well and get their answers. So anyways, next Sunday I'll be answering whatever questions you may have. Thing of some good ones! Talk to you next week!

Cheers!

Simone (Minnie) Banner

**Director of Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division**


End file.
